What should you do with toxic family members in your life?

By Soko Directory Team / Published January 28, 2022 | 11:34 am

KEY POINTS

Family is everything they say! But is it really sometimes? When you need them most is when they abandon you but whenever they need you, they expect you to be available all the time. Is that not a toxic trait?

KEY TAKEAWAYS

Once you resolve to change your own behavior, brace for strong negative reactions from family members and even friends.

You have all the absolute right to cut off any toxic person in your life, there is no right or wrong way to deal with such people in your life. If you tolerate them, definitely it is going to affect your emotional, physical, and relationship status.

The problem always comes in when the toxic person is the only breadwinner, sometimes it can even be your father or mother. But all in all, you need to put your peace of mind first, learn to choose yourself sometimes. Although it might sound selfish if the behavior does not change after a very long time then when you get a chance to cut them off do it.

I have interacted with a couple of friends and on several occasions, everyone has their family issues. Indeed no family is perfect. We all have our issues but worse is when it reaches a point where you no longer communicate with any of your family members because of the toxic environment they bring to your life. Even on your death bed, you would rather be buried in a piece of space at a Cemetery yet you have your Family land back home.

ALSO READ: 6 Amazing Things You Can Do With Your Bonga Points

Don’t be surprised if you are the toxic person in your family and they are beginning to cut you off slowly yet you are wondering why so and so no longer responds when I reach out. Let’s take a look at some of the character traits of toxic family members.

Getting Jealous of your achievements and trying to compete with you.

I know that in every family there is always that one person who is more successful than the others but most of the time they are never willing to assist or if they do is it always comes with threats.

But look at it this way, didn’t they work hard for what they have now? so why feel so entitled to their decisions especially if all of you in the family were given the same opportunities while growing up?

As much as they should be helping the other family members because they are the most powerful, it does not mean you control how they should spend their wealth and make decisions. These are some of the things that bring hatred and toxic traits in the family simply because one member of the family is the richest.

Comparison

When parents keep comparing their kids or when family members treat you differently from others based on your life achievements or behavior. For example, when your brother or sister is well organized in life, they were lucky to achieve more at a certain age than you and they keep on reminding you of your failures and mistakes it is toxic.

That’s why you find someone has committed suicide over family issues and you keep on wondering why yet it was the same family that put them in that situation.

Conversations are always about them

Take it this way, you have never checked on your brother or sister for a very long time but every time you reach out it is always about you. You make a call or text them about your issue and you have a conversation for over 30 Minutes but after you are done you haven’t even asked them how they are doing or why they have been silent and not communicating?

Sometimes you live in the same city and you do not communicate, visit or see each other for months yet you are blood siblings? You only meet on special occasions or in family meetings. Just how busy are you with your family members or are they the toxic ones in your life and you are cutting them off?

You are Given Ultimatums

When you are given conditions or responsibilities and deadlines to do something without knowing if you are capable or comfortable doing it. For example, you are asked by your family member to either buy them something, give them money or do something for your siblings without considering how you feel about it.

On some occasions, you even get blackmailed like you need to do this and this for so and so or you will no longer be my husband, wife, brother, sister, or relative.

They exhaust your energy

Dealing with a toxic family member can leave you drained and defeated especially if they are always dramatic, needy, and have high-maintenance tendencies. You might actually get exhausted every time you try to communicate with them and this can suck the energy right out of you.

The list is endless I can go on and on. If you feel exhausted by a certain person’s behavior in your family or marriage then it’s up to you to make a choice whether to continue feeling frustrated or free yourself from such bondage. Some people choose to cut off contact entirely. Others try to work with the situation by limiting contact with toxic family members and taking steps to protect their emotional well-being when they do see their family

When you make up your mind to cut the toxic family members in your life, one thing you need to know is some people hate change. Once you resolve to change your own behavior, brace for strong negative reactions from family members and even friends.

EDITOR’S NOTE:

Article by Doreen.

About Soko Directory Team

Soko Directory is a Financial and Markets digital portal that tracks brands, listed firms on the NSE, SMEs and trend setters in the markets eco-system.Find us on Facebook: facebook.com/SokoDirectory and on Twitter: twitter.com/SokoDirectory

View other posts by Soko Directory Team