Where Men Rule as Women Cry: Tears of the Marginalized Girl-Child

Tears flowed freely as girls rescued from early marriages, female genital mutilation, beading and other harmful cultural practices in Samburu County narrated of how their childhood had been brutally snatched from them and the long journey it has been to reclaim meaning in their lives.

At the Norfolk Towers, Huawei Technologies and Safaricom held a mentorship session for beneficiaries of the Samburu Girls Foundation, a shelter where over 326 girls escaping or rescued from the harmful cultural practices find a haven.

16 girls attended the event and we captured two heartrending stories from the group that gives hope to girls and prove that indeed a bright future lies ahead for the African girlchild, especially those that come from marginalized areas if only Government agencies fulfill their part.

Rael Jinais

At 13 years of age, Rael Jinais unlike other children her age who would be out playing and dreaming big was healing from a cut that had her bleed for days. It was not an accidental or a random cut but that of a right of passage according to her culture.

Rael’s father had passed on and her elder brother, was responsible for her, her mother was alive but as a woman, she had no say on such decisions. While in class 7, Rael’s elder brother felt she was fit for marriage and begun to seek a suitor for her.

One day while still in class seven and at 13 years of age, Rael got home to find a car that her brother ordered her to board as they were to run an errand several kilometers away in Maralal town.

Unknown to Rael that was the day she was to kiss goodbye to her childhood innocence as the brother was to marry her off. Playing wife at 13 years to a 38-year-old man was no easy task to young Rael. Rael’s ‘husband’ was a police officer, a man expected to know and protect the law, but his culture stood in the way.

Marriage life was an obvious uphill task pushing Rael to run away after four months of marriage despite the fear of facing her family’s wrath.

“Being married was painful, I could not sleep and kept on crying wondering why everything in life had to be so painful, fulfilling my marital responsibilities was even more painful,” Rael says before breaking down into sobs as we all take a break.

Also Read: Samburu Girls Foundation receives Ksh 5.9Mn from Safaricom

Rael got to her mother unaware that she had already conceived during the four months and begged to be allowed to resume school as she could not survive the marriage. Her mother had no objection, despite engaging in a cat and mouse with her elder brother who wanted her to return to her husband, and she managed to resume her class 8.

School for a pregnant girl in her school was not so much a big deal to her peers but the hormonal changes did not make it easy.

“My Grammar and computer teacher inspired me a lot and kept on encouraging me, I felt my hope renew despite the unceasing pesters from my brother,” Rael narrates.

“After sitting my KCPE, my mother had heard of Samburu Girls Foundation (SGF) and she took me to the center to escape a plan that was ongoing to return me to my then ‘husband’,” Rael explains.

It is at SGF that Rael got the opportunity to attend boarding secondary education away from the scares of early marriage and sat her KCSE in 2018.

Rael hopes to be a teacher in the future, and she can see there is a higher possibility to achieve that dream. Her baby is now four years old and under the care of Rael’s mother where Rael visits occasionally.

Sarafina Nang’ida Lorriakwe

Sarafina Nang’ida is a 20-year-old joyful girl whose smile is evidence of what she has conquered from neglect since an early age, pregnancy at 14 years and the death of her unborn child.

Sarafina’s woes began when her mother passed away and her father remarried. Sarafina had to nomad from one relative to the other and studied into different Primary schools.

With Sarafina’s mother dead and a remarried father whose wife paid no attention to young Sarafina, she felt rejected and unloved. “At 13 years, a man told me I was beautiful, and he loved me, I was blown away!” Sarafina says smiling shyly.

Sarafina’s smile fades immediately as she recounts how a relationship developed into a pregnancy that was to leave her forever scarred.

“I continued to go to school despite the Pregnancy and nausea spells through the stigma that came with it really made my life difficult, id hide behind the classroom and cry my pain away,” Sarafina says.

It is behind the teary sessions behind the classroom that her school headteacher found her and connected her to Josephine Kulea, the founder and CEO of SGF for counseling.

“At some point, my father wanted me married off when he found out I was pregnant, but I firmly told him that I was focused on sitting my KCPE and securing a slot with the wings to Fly program by Equity bank,” Sarafina expounds.

“A day to the KCPE rehearsals, I got admitted to Maralal hospital after the school took me to hospital following dizzy spells, my baby had died and was rotting while still in the womb,” Sarafina says emotionally.

Her womb got cleaned up but her experience became more painful as there was no counseling to help overcome the trauma.

Sarafina focused on her studies to distract herself from the painful memories and passed her KCPE qualifying her entry to a national school from where she scooped a B-Grade that now has her studying BSc. Mathematics.

“Don’t judge us if you have not had to walk through our shoes,” a teary Sarafina concludes.

The stories shared were a clear indication that the Government has a huge responsibility it is yet to deliver to the people of marginalized communities as the two stories were just but a drop in the ocean of the lives destroyed.