When Those Who Depend On The Breadwinner Want Him Dead

Imagine when those who depend on you want you dead… Imagine when those who you wake up daily for at 5 am, to work hard for, to toil for, to ensure that they have a roof above their heads, and food on the table, want you very dead. Dead, completely. Gone, to the land of no return.

Imagine if your spouse prays daily that you do not come back alive… Imagine if she prays that you die of 10 diseases combined? Imagine if she hopes that you die a horrible death of HIV/AIDS, Gonorrhea, Diarrhea, Flu, Malaria, Meningitis, Pneumonia, Witchcraft… Imagine that.

Imagine if your spouse wakes up every morning to pray that you die from a horrible accident… That your car collides with a lorry carrying raw sewage… Imagine when she hopes that the accident should be so bad that there shall be no time to mourn… Sounds terrible. Right?

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But it happens, and I have seen. I have experienced it and I have heard it. And they do not hide. They tell you they wish you were dead. That they wish you were gone. And it crushes you into a thousand pieces, because the wish comes from the quarters you never expected.

And you sit down and you start asking yourself: what will these people do when I am finally gone? I am the breadwinner. I pay rent. I buy food. I pay school fees. Why do they want me dead? Do they have any other source of income? And then, the only thing that remains is tears and hopelessness. You realize that you have no one to cheer you on.

You start questioning why you are working so hard for people who do not appreciate you. You start doubting why, instead of wanting you dead, they should leave instead. But they are not ready to leave, because they are with you for convenience. They are like ticks, with you, because you have blood and will bolt the moment that blood runs out.

Otherwise, khabusie.

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