Do it right: Don’t ruin it, perfect tips for a marriage proposal

Thinking of proposing to her might leave you a bit nervous, wondering if you will be doing it in the right way. Hey, before you get down on one knee to say the four words, you  might need to learn a few tips of popping the question.

Test the Waters

Make sure you talk to her about marriage prior to your proposal. Both of you should have similar interest and agree on sensitive issues like kids and finance. You don’t want her to be taken completely off guard, as such a proposal is almost certainly guaranteed to elicit only a hesitating yes, if not a, “I’ll have to think about it.”


Let it be a Surprise
Despite the fact that you have discussed getting married, the proposal itself should remain a surprise. Find the right time when she won’t be suspecting. Don’t let her get any hint about it.

Be organized
Asking the four worded question (will you marry me?) can be a giant deal, and one that may leave you completely speechless. It might feel frivolous but then you need to practice saying the words a few times before the proposal. You can write down exactly what you’re going to say to make sure you come off smooth and confident.

Get her the right ring
The ring you choose for her shall remain a lifetime commitment, so make sure it’s the right style. You might find an opportunity to window shop for the ring together or bring up in a conversion. To make it more secretive, you can ask her mother or her best girlfriend to help you choose the ring. Make sure it remains a top secret.


Talk to Her Parents
We are in the 21st century where women are no longer properties who need their father’s permission to do anything but then it’s still nice and respectful to ask for the parents’ blessings prior to proposal.

Pick a Personal Spot and be creative
Think about your favorite romantic places. Choose a meaningful spot to pop the question. It could be as simple as your living room, or as complicated as whisking her away for a weekend in Dubai… Just don’t ask her in a supermarket! Make it memorable rather than just a cookie cutter proposal.

Drop to One Knee
It might feel 1960 to you, but there is something so charming and romantic about a man on one knee asking the love of his life to marry him. Even if you’re not a traditional guy, it will add to the seriousness and lovingness of the proposal.

Tell her why she is the one you have chosen on
Don’t just utter those 4 little words, tell her why she’s the one for you, what marriage means to you, and what your hopes for the future are. You might say something like “My life has never and could never be the same after I met you. You’ve made me more joyful, more stable, and more inspired. I can’t picture the rest of my life without you by my side. Will you do me the honor of marrying me?” I swear you will get a YES to this before you even finish your sentence.

Share the News
You can also take pictures for remembrance. Take a moment to reflect on your engagement.

Don’t Make it Public or before her family
If scriptwriters are to be believed, every wedding proposal takes place in front of a thousand people. Most women would prefer to have that magical moment to be just for the two of you.  After all, you’ve got the rest of your lives to tell other people about your marriage. Bring along a cell phone or calling card to share the news.

Don’t hide the engagement ring in food
I hate to say it, but hiding the engagement ring in food is a tired idea and unhealthy. It’s been in a thousand movies and TV episodes, and you won’t win any points for creativity. Even worse, you may end your romantic proposal with a trip to the emergency room or the dentist. Do you still want to do that? I bet not.

Don’t propose at a sports game, especially soccer
Soccer games are loud and chaotic events. Even if she is the biggest sports fan you ever knew, the arena doesn’t allow you to have any of the reflection and focus that making such a momentous decision deserves. It isn’t romantic at all.

Don’t make it too knotty
While it’s good to be creative with your proposal, it is important to keep the focus on what’s important: the proposal itself. If you are worrying about whether or not the limousine will get to the balloon ride in time, you’re worrying about the wrong thing.

Don’t Propose Too Early in the Relationship
When you’re in the first flush of love, it’s hard not to do impetuous and foolish things. Yet waiting until your relationship is stable will only strengthen your marriage. Make sure you really know each other, and what each other want from a marriage before you commit to it for the rest of your lives.

Don’t Expect Her to Say Yes Immediately
You’re asking someone to spend the rest of their life with you, an extremely important decision. Just because you’ve asked, doesn’t mean she is ready to say yes. If your sweetheart says maybe, take it in stride and give her some time to consider the proposal. After all, you wouldn’t want this amazing person to marry every Tom, Dick and Harry who asked her, would you?

By Irine Nyanga